Monday, December 28, 2009

Panic Attack!



Tipped off to this by a friend who lives in the Hollywood Sector. Says this lil' indie dude from Uruguay is blowing up in Hollywood because of this. Sorta like a proto District Nine scenario, I guess. Anyway i thought it was cute, despite the trite soundtrack.




It's a smidge too clean.

4 comments:

Mr. Pony said...

'Clean' is a good word to describe this otherwise fun vignette's one major flaw. I'm no fan of Michael Bay, but the hand-held thing isn't helped by everything being in perfect focus all the time.

Also, to ask a larger question, why does everyone in the universe wait until the end of the fight to use their ultimate weapon? Why not open with it?

Fugu said...

Not enough Gals in it. The clean doesn't bother me at all, but that ultimate weapon thing bugs the shit out of me. I don't get why this kind of crappy logic gives me diarrhea when I have no problem with Avatar or 2012. Maybe because those movies don't want you to use your brain—the plot was phoned in, there's no puzzle to solve, you just sit back and enjoy the silly.

This dude here, though, seems to want you to think. Who are these robots and why are they fucking our shit up? Well, fine, but then maybe you shouldn't make your robots so dumb. And not emotionally dumb. Why bother shooting holes in a city that you're just going nuke in a few minutes? And why destroy perfectly good, battle-hardened robots when you've got flying things that can drop nukes from the air?

It's how that child molester says in the Star Wars review: "Worst plot device ever shoved into a movie for convenience". I think there was a post a while back that said this is a huge problem for science fiction in general—they're suckers for ruining stories just to get that awesome space battle or to force some cheap Hollywood ending.

Anyway. Sorry, if the indie gentleman from Uruguay ever reads this. I'm sure none of this is your fault or that I'm completely missing the point, and we could probably be great friends under different circumstances. When you come to Hawaii I will apologize in person and buy you many drinks and you can teach me about movie theory. If you're not married, maybe I can introduce you to some of my friends. I'm sure you'll click with at least one of them, and you can set up a movie studio here. You could eventually offer me a job as a consultant as I love ranting about things that bother me and you'll apparently like to listen. I will of course say yes, having recently gone back to school to get a masters in _______, which I will get bored with. We will make a series of movies that are logically coherent, and incredibly boring. Not a single person will see them. The company will be bankrupt, and we'll get in a horrible argument after which you'll accuse me of LARPing with your wife. This will be true, but an honest, completely innocent bond we will actually share with a few other readers of this blog. We'll show you pictures, but you won't understand. You'll move back to Uruguay with your wife, but leave your children behind for me to raise. I'll plead for you to take them with you, but you'll say it's some fucking plot device and it will all make sense in a few years. It'll turn out you're right as they marry Panic's kids. You'll come back for the weddings, and we will all become friends again and forgive each other. We will end up making a Von Trap-Sound of Music like movie, but with LARPing, and it will be a HUGE success.

Galspanic said...

You score some of that Mark Twain flavored coffee too, Fufu?

Heeero said...

Fugu wrote:
"It's how that child molester says in the Star Wars review: "Worst plot device ever shoved into a movie for convenience". I think there was a post a while back that said this is a huge problem for science fiction in general—they're suckers for ruining stories just to get that awesome space battle or to force some cheap Hollywood ending."

Sooo...kinda like BSG?