So the 2009 First Hawaiian International Auto Show didn't have a lot of concept cars or anything, probably because we live on an island, and/or because U.S. automakers probably figured it would be in bad taste to suggest that they had any ideas or anything. Anyway, guess what's back in style, according to the American car companies? Big giant cars! Trends are so funny!
Oh good. They're making a Hummer pickup truck so assholes can drive around the city and not haul their asshole stuff. Upshot: This truck seats fewer assholes! Not that many fewer assholes, but when you're out and about, every asshole that stays at home counts.
The 2009 Escalade from Cadillac is easily one of the biggest SUVs I've ever seen. Good news, though, it gets 21 miles to the gallon, the equivalent of a regular-sized car (with shitty mileage). How, you ask? Well, because it's a hybrid. You know how I can tell? Because there's a huge fucking plaque on the side of the thing telling you so. I swear, the thing could have gotten 22 or 23 mpg if it didn't have to haul this giant stupid visible-from-space HYBRID badge around.
Speaking of Hybrids: Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the Honda Prius!
I was all set to make fun of this car, but now that I think about it, there's something just a little bit right about having a Corvette painted like a Trapper Keeper.
One kind of neat/disorienting thing about all the cars there--The tires were all very, very clean.
8 comments:
I like your comment on the Honda Prius... I wonder how it drives. I hear it gets less mileage than the original Prius.
I heard Sean Hannity, the Fox news bloviator, boast on the air once about his hybrid Cadillac Escalade. I think he thinks he's protecting the environment by driving that thing.
We should all ride bikes. If only I could ride one over the Pali and back.
I can't believe Honda even copied the Prius' horrible bar-across-the-back windshield. That's like having the opportunity to redesign pregnancy and leaving in the daily vomiting only because the other guys did it.
As for a comparison between the two models--this looked thorough, but I haven't read it. And I love the winner: The 1990 Geo Metro!
"That's like having the opportunity to redesign pregnancy and leaving in the daily vomiting only because the other guys did it."
Awesome.
I like cars a lot, and I really like fast cars a lot, so probably I shouldn't post here. I think big SUVs and hummers are rediculous, but I still like my car.
What kind of car do you drive, LC?
http://www.zcars.com.au/images/ac-schnitzer-acs1-35i22.jpg
BMW 135i. I like it.
I know I came off as all greener-than-thou with this post, but that was in the name of keeping things simple for humor's sake. True, I drive a hybrid, but my other car is a white Amercian truck on its last legs that gets horrible mileage. And should the truck die, I'm seriously thinking of replacing it with a nondescript white van with a small apartment/mobile command center, or possibly a bay to garage a smaller escape car in the back. Not exactly saving the Earth, there. I have other concerns as well.
Your car looks very fast, Litcube. That is a good photograph. The metal door behind the car looks like anime speed lines. The car is parked, but it looks like it is going super-fast. Be careful out there!
Wait, Pony. You're thinking of getting a serial rapist van?
So Mr. Pony, did you hear soft popping noises while you were at the auto show? That was the sound of stupid people pulling their heads out of their asses to reach for their wallets so they could put a down on a gas guzzling behemoth. You know what's sad? I've actually heard people talking about buying a gigantic SUV because they're so fat they can't fit in a regular 4 door sedan. You just know that those are the people who will be calling in fat one day at the office.
I can understand you might need a larger vehicle if you regularly haul stuff but if its for your ass you probably need a reality check. Or at least a few slaps.
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