Thursday, November 8, 2007

Uniqlock


Our friend Demon Curry (who has a standing invitation to join this blong as an author) sent me this. I could watch it all day. I think I will watch it all day.

Goodbye.

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

you know...

For the krillions of things Family guy doesn't do well, I thought this was sorta good:

Monday, November 5, 2007

Sunday, November 4, 2007

Earth 617


Dudes, there is a very terrifying blong in the slot right next to ours.

Pukele Stream Overruns its Banks

Okay, that may have been ill-advised. I keep forgetting that my "backyard" completely reconfigures itself every twenty-four hours, and that moon or no, it's raining hard and dark, dark, dark. When I got to the bottom (my backyard has a bottom) the lightning helped me not fall in the stream, so that was cool. Thanks, world.

Anyway, it was like I was on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride, but I had fallen off the boat and climbed ashore, and the ride itself was broken, and leaking. It was also like there was another Pirates of the Caribbean ride on top of the one I was in, like on the second floor, and that one was also broken and leaking. And maybe it was raining, too. That's what it was like, guys.

All in all, this is pretty sweet. I find I love living in the 'Lolo.

Friday, November 2, 2007

Attention: Hung Won is Not Closing

There was this really old greasy little take-out-only dim sum place on the main commercial street in the neighborhood we live in called Kwong On. You could get these little pork hash dumplings there for 40 cents, U.S. and baked manapua and turnip cake with little shrimps in it and other dumplings with green and gray stuff in them, for some equally appallingly low price. You could get enough food to kill you for three dollars, basically. So they announced that they were closing, and for weeks there was a line out the door. That happens here, for some reason. I don't know why they were closing. Maybe they weren't charging enough. Maybe they were breaking the law by selling something for 40 cents. I mean, it has to be illegal to pass that kind of savings onto the customer!

So they closed.

Also, there is a full sit-down Chinese Restaurant on the same street, called Hung Won. I heard that they were closing also. This, I felt, was too bad, because more restaurants and fewer auto parts stores is always a good thing. Walking by Hung Won, I stepped inside and asked when they were closing.

The Chinese lady at the counter got real mad and threw her hands up in the air. "We're not closing!" she said, in a Chinese accent I will not attempt to transcribe here. "Everybody thinks we are closing! We are not closing!"

"Oh, good," I said. "More restaurants and fewer auto parts--"

"It is KWONG ON! They are the ones that are closing! They have closed already! KWONG ON!"

"I'll spread the word. I'm sure--

"HUNG WON!" she screamed. "KWONG ON! You see; they are different! Quite different! HUNG... WON! KWONG... ON!"

"I--"

"People do not LISTEN!" Howling, she tore her shirt off. She climbed up onto the counter, and slammed her head against the overhanging shelf. Put her foot in a tray of cake noodles, which was inside one of those short cardboard boxes they ship cans of soda in. "PEOPLE ARE DEAF!" Still stooping, she reached up and brought the entire shelf down, releasing a torrent of three or four phone books, followed by a swarm of dozens and dozens of beetles the size of Hot Wheels. They crawled over her bare chest and down her legs and dove into the food, chittering and squeaking with beetle delight. She screamed again, sounding like a cross between a playground whistle and a tugboat. The windows shattered, and three burning men flailed out of the kitchen and tripped over each other trying to get outside. They were screaming. I was screaming. Hot oil spilled out of the kitchen and across the floor. The men fell, igniting the oil.

Anyway, we're going tomorrow night, with my sister and her husband. You guys wanna go? They said it was good.

Wedge=aeronaught=furry

So Garrick Hagon? The guy who plays Wedge? He's the voice of Lee Scoresby in the Golden Compass audio series. I figured this is noteworthy.

Edit: yeah ok, I FAIL. It's friggin Biggs. How did I not recognize that mustache?!? 



And this: Ferucio, dude, just come out already. We're ok with it.

Edit: Ferucio is the guy in the bull outfit.