Argument #31 with "going green" is that one of the best ways to make an impact is to write to your congressman, call up a senator, etc. The problem is that there's a much higher potential of sounding like a complete jackass if you don't know what you're talking about when trying to change legislation than compared to just buying a CFL or two, so people don't do it (not to mentioned being labeled as an activist. Fucking hippies.). For example, here's how my phone call went:Man on phone: Hello? This is the President.
Fugu: Hi! I'm calling on be-
Man on phone: FUCK YOU, FUCKING HIPPIE! I'd rather dry hump a rhino than give to your organization!
Since today is Earth Day, the first thing I did when I got up this morning is run to the Internet to see what Google did to their logo. It's green! Unfortunately, the only listed Hawaii event at the ED website (not the erectile dysfunction site, that's different) is to clean up the Ala Wai. There was also that Kokua Festival, but considering the smell as we drove by the second night it may have had more to do with 420 for some of the participants than Earth Day.
What are you going to do today for Earth Day? Me, I'm going start off the day by murdering the rooster that woke me up before 6am this morning. Then I'm going use it for a bacon-wrapped coq au vin in a brandy reduction sauce. Apparently the Internet says a pinot noir is a good pairing for coq au vin, but that's fucking retarded so I'll use a boxed white instead. I may also make some cranberry-chocolate tarts for desert. Happy Earth Day!
4 comments:
That fucking rooster. I'm surprised you didn't mention the half insane braking from the dog living up the street. kept me up till three.
I was thinking about raping our natural resources with coffee and then using fossil fuels to go look at and possibly purchase brightly colored petroleum based products that have been shipped here. On the upswing at least the brightly colored petroleum based products are priced to match their resource squandering.
But really, who mentions braking anyway?
Dude. I don't think that even classifies as barking anymore. There's at least two over there that sound like starving, half monkey, half troll babies with megaphones taped to their faces crying at two human babies dangling above them, just out of reach.
I mean to say that they want to eat them. The human babies. Well the monkey-troll babies, eating the human babies. That's what monkey-troll babies do. The dogs sound like that.
I have some dead CFLs. Today is Earth Day, so I will wait until tomorrow to dump the mercury from them into Pukele Stream.
Is there a script on the back of that card? I seriously have no idea what I would say to my congressman. Come to think of it, I would really hate to be a congressman. I bet you get a lot of people calling and then hanging up because they're not quite sure what they want to say.
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